Being Single Isn't Always Easy

Being All Things To All People

The last person in the world that I expected to be at my door was Jimmy.  He had hitch-hiked to Dallas from Virginia.  And here he was, no warning, no phone call, just bam.  I am sure that not only did I look surprised to see him, I probably looked panic-stricken because I was.

I hadn't seen him since 1969 when he drove up to Maryland to tell me that David had been wounded.  A lot had happened to both of us since then.  I invited him in and gave him something to drink; he looked hot and tired.  I guess so; hitch-hiking can't be easy.  He was surprised to see my two little boys.  He knew that they were mine by the red hair.  He was playing around with them, asking them silly questions like guys do. I already knew that he didn't have the money for a hotel room so he would have to stay with us.  That was going to be a problem for me.  How was I going to hide him from the other guys?  My head was pounding.

I didn't have anything to eat in the house except for cereal. We would have to go get something.  I was afraid to go out because I could run into Daniel somewhere.  He wouldn't mind that I had a visitor, but he would mind that he would spend the night.  I would have to wait until it got dark, and then we would go eat, and I would drive him downtown.  They were going to implode a big office building in Dallas that night; I thought that the kids and Jimmy might find that entertaining.

I took the freeway that was right by my house.  The chances of running into Daniel were not as likely as they would be on the city streets.  I stopped at Burger King so they could eat.  My kids were so picky about food that it didn't really matter where we ate.  They would get a kids meal and eat the parts they liked.  Jimmy ate like he hadn't eaten in days.  I think I just got fries and a drink.  I was a little stressed out.

We drove into Dallas proper; Jimmy talked and told me about his adventures as a medic in Vietnam.  He told me about his whole family, everyone except David.  So I asked him about David.  He said that he had just moved in with a girl in some little podunk town in Virginia.  I didn't comment on that.  It didn't make me happy, but it wasn't like David, and I were together.  Jimmy said that David did not know that he had traveled to see me.  Okay, whatever, if he had known that I was trying to get in touch with him, it might have made a difference.  I always knew that Jimmy had liked me; he had told me that when he was babysitting me while David was in Vietnam.   I had told him that I could never have feelings for him, which was still how I felt.

We found a parking place and walked down to the area of the impending blow-up.  There were a lot of people down there, a lot of photographers and a lot of cops.  I guess it was a pretty big deal.  I certainly had never seen a building blown up before. I didn't have a clue what it would be like.  The crowd was standing in a roped-off area in a small park.  They told everyone to stand by.  I had ahold of my kids; I didn't want Jeff running off during his excitement.  And bam. Bam, bam.  It was like dominos, the charge would go off, and the building would start collapsing in sections.  Everyone was getting a kick out of it.  It was pretty cool.  When it was over, dust was heavy in the air.  It was hard to breathe that stuff in, so we left.  The kids and Jimmy thought it was the coolest thing they had ever seen.

By now, it was getting late.  We left, and I took a long way home so that I didn't have to drive in any of Daniel's territory.  The kids fell asleep in the car; Jimmy was falling asleep.  I wanted to fall asleep but couldn't.

We parked, and  I put them in bed right away. Jimmy carried Jeff in.  Glen walked but was half asleep.
I put them in bed as soon as we got in.  I told Jimmy he could sleep on the sofa and brought him covers.  I asked him what he was going to do the next day.  He said he was tired and he would just hang out until I got home.  I told him whatever he did to not answer the phone or the door.  I gave him my work phone number and told him to call me if he needed anything.  And I went into my room and shut and locked my door.

No sooner had I put my head on the pillow, my phone rang.  It was from Daniel.  He said that he had built up some comp time and could leave early and come over if I wanted him to.  I told him that I had just laid down, and I was exhausted.  He said that was fine.  He would just save his time and add on to it for another night.  He asked me about the weekend if I would like to go out.  I told him I would, but I already had plans and couldn't change them.  (France)  I asked him if maybe he would like to come over for dinner on his night off the following Tuesday, and he said that would be great.  I told him I would talk to him the next day and that I could hardly keep my eyes open, so we said goodnight.

No sooner had I hung up than my phone rang again.  This time, it was France.  He had called earlier.  I told him that I had taken the kids downtown to see the building blow up.  He said he would have liked to have seen it.  I told him it was a last-minute thing.  (Which it was.)  He wanted to know about Saturday night.  Where did I want to go?  I told him to decide but that it would be nice to go where we could dance.  He liked that idea.  He said he would like to see the kids again and be around them.  I told him that their dad had a new girlfriend who was crazy about them, and she would have them for the weekend.  He talked and talked until I was almost falling asleep.  And then we said goodbye.  I had pulled it off; I had successfully juggled three different guys in one night.  But I didn't like it.  It made me nervous.  And it made me feel a little guilty.

The next morning I tried to be quiet so Jimmy could sleep.  But my kids were always rowdy in the morning.  He must have been exhausted because not even the noise that they made was enough to wake him.

We went out to the car, and I had a note on my windshield from Daniel.  I really liked that.  It was so cheesy but really sweet of him to drive all that way away from his area just to leave me a note and make sure that things were safe.  I always wondered if any of my neighbors took the notes off and read them.  I would have.

I was fatigued that morning.  When I got to work, I told Mary everything that had happened.  She thought it was funny but warned me to be careful.  She asked me who was the most likely of the three guys to get really mad about competing with two other guys.  "France!"  "No question about it; he would be pissed off."  She asked me how mad he might get.  I had to think about it for a minute. " I think he would get outraged, probably verbal."  She warned me to be extra careful because he was management, he could make my life unpleasant.  I didn't want to think about that.  Jealous men were a pain; I had spent years getting rid of one, I didn't want to have problems with another one.

I talked to Jimmy in the afternoon.  I told him to eat whatever he could find and that I would see him when I got home.  He wanted to know if we were going anywhere, and I told him that I hadn't thought about it.  He wanted to get some beer.  I told him that Dallas had bizarre laws about liquor and beer sales.  Not every place sold it, only in certain areas.  I would take him to get it when I got home.

France came to the back room and told me that he had made reservations for Saturday night for dinner, and then we would go to another place to dance and drink.  I smiled at him and told him I was looking forward to it.  He was a terrific dancer, and if there was one thing I liked, it was being swept off my feet on the dance floor.  Holding each other close, smelling perfume and cologne and the feel of his biceps through his shirt.  Yep, I like that.  I was looking forward to it.

But first, I had to figure out what to do about my visitor and think about how seriously I wanted to take Daniel.  And I had a lot to think about as far as France was concerned.  Why wasn't life simple?