I Refuse To Hustle

Friday.  It was Friday.  Our last full day and night in San Antonio.  We had to make the most of it.  We slept until about 10 AM.  Then we had "the ritual" to go through.  Shower, shampoo hair, dry and style hair, and put on makeup.  And then our clothes, of course.  Now, we were ready to roll.

We were going to the zoo, which was in Brackenridge Park.  We were in no hurry; we would just take our time and enjoy it.  It's been a few years since I was there, but I remember it as a nice zoo.  Nice meaning, clean, safe, and the animals were not all sleeping, and they looked well taken care of.  Over the years, I have changed my opinion about circuses and animal shows where animals are forced to perform for the public.  Knowing the cruelty imposed on animals that are forced to perform, I no longer support them or their cause.  A zoo is a little different, it can protect animals on the extinction list, and for the most part, the inhabitants are not poked, prodded, or beaten into submission for human amusement.  I always have felt sorry for Elephants, though.  They are, for the most part, gentle giants.  I hate to see them chained around the ankles.  They should be free to roam.

Has anyone ever wondered why just about every zoo has a train?  And it goes nowhere, except in a circle?  And the adults will almost throw their kids on it in a frantic attempt to get themselves, the parents, a seat.  ???

Like just about every zoo that I have ever been to, this one was up and downhill, up and downhill, up and, well, you get it.  And it was, of course, sweltering.  And those hills are killers in the heat.  This outing would definitely call for showers and freshly shampooed hair before going out for the evening.  The only break one could catch was going into the air-conditioned Reptile house, and I hated them, still do.  And the Reptile House has an unmistakable smell to it that just makes my stomach do flips.  What is THAT smell?  Hold your nose and cool down; that was the ticket.  And then you accidentally look over and see one of those 250 foot long pythons and almost pass out from the sheer enormity of it.  Okay, it was twenty-something feet long, but still, it looked like 250 feet to
me.  I had to get out of there; I could deal with the heat better than the snakes.  I had nightmares from looking at that critter.  Really, I did.

It was time to find some shade and drinks, maybe even a crappy hot dog.  I started to get the shakes and weak knee syndrome, and I knew what would follow that, dizziness and possible fainting.  "Two hot dogs and 2 Dr. Peppers, please."  I was NOT going to faint on vacation.

 We sat in the shade of the snack bar area and talked about what we would do that night.  "Magic Time Machine?"  "Nah. There were just too many guys there.  This is Friday night; it will be even worse."  Did I just say that?  Really, I was right.  It would be packed with lonely service guys eager to make friends.  My heart wasn't in that.  "Let's just walk around the River Walk and go to every club before we leave.  We can drink and get something to eat and dance it off."  That was the plan,  "Are you ready to go, Mary?  I've had enough heat and sun for now."  And just like that, we left.

We drove all around the city one last time.  We were going to miss this place.  I would come back 4 more times, but those times were nowhere near the antics achieved by the two single friends on this trip.

Last night in town.  Special wardrobe, special hair, killer makeup.  We smelled delightful and looked lush, just like the landscaping everywhere.  Mary had bought me an outfit from Joske's Department Store that first morning she went out alone.  It was a surprise, and I would wear it tonight.  It was a very lightweight material, light-colored; it actually made me look a little tanned.  Little.  It was a killer outfit.  Mary always looked good.  She had a mysterious air about her, a type of charisma and charm that attracted men to her.  I don't think she knew that she possessed it; she was totally unaffected by her power.  One last mirror check then we were on our way out the door.

We decided to start out at our favorite cafe.  We knew they would be giving us free drinks.  We sat down and ordered our drinks.  It was already more crowded than we had seen it all week.  We started people watching, which led to a conversation, which led to laughing and, yes, sometimes snorting.  We were attracting people again.  And here come the free drinks.  Yee-ha! That's what they say in Texas for, "Oh Boy!"  It didn't take long for a couple of guys to start sending us drinks.  We eventually invited them over.  They were from Austin.  Now, they weren't just from Austin, one guy was the Mayor of Austin, and the other guy was his assistant.  Celebrities, well, sort of.  They were with a group from Austin and had separated themselves from the group because they wanted to have some incognito fun.  Well, let's get the incognito started.

They were fun, so we invited them along to our club-hopping journey.   Some of the places had dance floors; some did not.  So, the ones without, we just sat and drank and talked. They told us about one "around the bend" that had a dance floor.  We decided to go to that one, but we had to go back up to street level and then go back down.  When we got to the street level, a small female cop had a guy detained for carrying a gun.  Just about the time, we topped the steps, he started fighting her for the gun.  We froze in our tracks.  The guys stepped forward and were going to help her, but she started screaming at us to run and get away.  They were really fighting over the gun now, so we took her orders and hauled ass down the other stairway.  That was the closest I had ever come to a crazy gun situation.  I was shaking like a leaf when it was over.  The cure for that was another drink.

We made it to the club in one piece.  No bullet holes.  All of their Austin friends were in that club whooping it up.  I mean, really, really whooping it up.  And then it happened.  Oh, hell, no!  No!

HUSTLE!!!!  I hated that record; I hated the dance even more.  And all of the Austin people loved it.  And they all were doing it, over and over and over.  And then one of the guys grabbed my arm and said, "Let's go!"  "No, I hate this song, and I hate this stupid dance."    I think he thought I was playing hard to get.  He pulled me out on the floor with EVERYBODY.  I just stood there.  I was not going to do this stupid damn dance.  I just stood at the end of one of the lines, not moving.  Then I went and sat down and ordered a drink.  The other guy came and grabbed me to dance.  He suffered the same reception; I stood in one spot, then went and sat down.  Then they all came after me.  "Stop.  I am fine sitting here; you guys go Hustle your brains out.  I will be fine."  And so they did.

I was fine.  People would bring me a drink and sit down and talk to me.  I was content to spend the rest of the evening in that chair.  And that was good because the drinks were kicking in.   Mary was having the time of her life.  I was glad.  This was an okay way for me to spend our last night in town.  And then they started playing Patsy Cline's San Antonio Rose.  We had heard that a million times since landing in San Antonio.  I didn't do any of that two-stepping country dancing at that time and wasn't going to now.  There was no rose in San Antonio for me.  Just alcohol.

The next morning we sadly packed our things up and left.  It was going to be a long, sad drive back to Dallas.  Reality sucks.

And then I remembered that I still had Daniel and France to deal with and I would start my training for the new job on Monday morning.  That gave me some good things to think about on the way home.

And I said a prayer to the music god and asked that I never had to hear The Hustle again.  It didn't work.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wj23_nDFSfE